Saturday, December 13, 2008

SLOW NEWS DAY

This last week or so I was riding the crimson wave so I couldn't really do much of anything. It consisted of me ordering pizza, nursing my cramps and watching Lost non-stop. All in all, not a bad way to spend the week but by the weekend it was time to work.

I posted a few ads yesterday and didn't get ONE client to come through. Womp womp womp. That means it's time to run a special. I hate lowering my rates for anyone but I got an unpleasant little shock when I checked my bank account last night.

I also saw that one of the agencies that advertises on the board I use is throwing a holiday party tomorrow night at a strip club. I never go to these kinds of things. My privacy is a huge deal to me and you KNOW people bring cameras. However so many people are going that I'd be BOUND to make a ton of money. ON THE OTHER HAND it seems a little heated to me...but with so many people attending (this isn't the first party) it seems safe enough. Mostly I'm hesitant because it's not like I can ask for references on the spot. Safety first!

Sunday, November 30, 2008

FUCK A CRITIC (my comments in bold, obv)

Suffering from a little insomnia, so I figured I'd write about my time with [redacted]. First of all, it is hard to get a date with her because of her screening. But if she is able to get enough dates, then I guess it works for her. What's the point of even saying that?! you said you were 100% cool with my process because of my safety. After a few emails, I set up a date through her assistant and as forewarned in a few other reviews, she was a no call, no show (she texted me an hour after the fact).BULLSHIT i totally let him know beforehand and he didn't respond to ME until like 2 hours later. Since I'm a sucker for young spinners, I set up another appt with her directly and she assured me she would commit. Was a disappointment, but she's got what some of us want. you didn't seem disappointed when you left! Plenty of other girls for those who don;t want the hassle. and plenty of other Johns, too.

Got to her location and was met by a beautiful small girl. I could wrap my hands almost around her waist. We talked to get better acquainted. She didn't really initiate anything so I gave her a massage leading to kissing and an extended session of DATY. She was very responsive and I just enjoyed her little body. Eventually got to some missionary where I went pretty quickly. Cleaned up and was on my way. I will see her again. Had a good time and next time should be even better, though she doesn't appear to be offering the 90 minutes special anymore. THIS IS ALL YOU HAD TO SAY.

One other observation is I realized while I like the younger girls, the slightly older girls seem to realize that we guys (at least me) need a little more foreplay and want a girl who knows what she likes and takes the lead a bit, making the time together equally and mutually enjoying. When I just want to have fun, a girl like [redacted]is perfect, but when I need more subtle attention, a girl like [redacted] is perfect. dude, communication is obviously not your forté. had you said something, i would've stayed another hour with you. everyone leaves a satisfied customer!


This is what I had to wake up to today wtf. I'm so upset. Business has been so good lately. Something like this can (and probably will) screw up my business.
I
promptly placed an ad online offering an outcall special. I need this to blow over quickly and the best way to do that is to blow someone else and have him write a stellar review. The next guy's experience basically has to be like "wtf was that other guy thinking." FUCK I'M SO PISSED. I freaked out after I read it and sent the guy like 2 messages so hopefully he'll edit it or take the whole thing down. This is such improper etiquette! The guy always asks me if I even want a review up. AND THE AUDACITY TO NAME-DROP ANOTHER PROVIDER? WHAT THE FUCK THIS IS BLOWING MY MIND.



FUCK

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Ho Ho Ho

Black Friday kicks off the beginning of holiday hell. I'm scared to go to the mall for the next month. I don't understand why people still go when there are so many great deals online. You don't even have to put clothes on! 3 people have already died (2 people shot each other at TOYS R US and 1 wal-mart worker got TRAMPLED trying to open the door in the morning).

With the economy being as iffy as it is this holiday season I'm a little bit concerned. So far my business has only picked up, which is good and sort of expected since people get really lonely during the holidays. I just hope it stays like this instead of people cutting back completely on my services. I don't see that many married people so I think things will be golden.

Friday, November 28, 2008

ASK ME ANYTHING

I get a lot of questions regarding what I do and they're always new and interesting. If you have anything you want to ask me, comment in this post!

"I'm making turkey meatloaf for my cat"

WOW.


So yesterday morning I woke up to a text from the one with the cat at about 4:45am asking me to come over on Thanksgiving for a quickie. Seeing as how I'm trying to get out of town this weekend, I'm not turning down any appointments. He's a regular of mine anyway so it was no big deal.

I get there right on time and he lets me in. I move over to the couch and we start chit-chatting. I was only scheduled for 15 minutes so we sped through the pleasantries and got down to work. I will always see this guy because #1- he's easy, b- he's close, and 4- he brings epic lulz.

As I'm hurrying to get my clothes on and gtfo the door so I can indulge in turkey he says he's going to spend the day with his cat and make her turkey meatloaf.


What a sad, sad specimen, oh my.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

The Tickler


I had someone contact me because he wanted to schedule a fetish session. His fetish is that he likes to tickle. That's all he wanted to do- tickle me. I love sessions like this because albeit a little weird for me, personally it's such easy money that I can't turn it down.

When he came in the room I swear I thought he looked like this guy from revenge of the nerds, sans glasses but just as awkward.
He was nice enough but I was still a little weary. I got the impression, fast that he was the kind of guy who liked to test boundaries- like a fucking dog. When it comes to fetishes, I always find out what it is they want beforehand and then I set my price. There is no deviation of the plan from there, yanno? I need to know what to expect ahead of time. All in all not a bad experience. Interesting is how i'd describe it.

I was down to my skivvies with him just getting tickled for an hour. For someone who was so into it he could've been a lot better at it. He was scratching me and poking me a lot, not tickling so how was I supposed to laugh? I'm actually really ticklish so I can't understand how someone could be that bad. I can't believe i'm reviewing his tickling technique.

I've been doing this way too long.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

#6

For those of you who haven't read my blogs before, I'll tell you a little about myself:
  • I'm a 20-something escort (obviously).
  • I'm college educated.
  • I guess you could say I'm really an artist.
  • I was never abused or anything like that.

I'm so normal that this world that I've discovered is providing me with hours and hours of entertainment. Lucky for you, I could talk about this all day. Now that you're caught up...


It's Sunday morning and I already have a few people trying to see me today. This is good for me because my cash flow situation has been majorly sucking ass. I can't get more eloquent about it than that. I haven't even had my coffee yet.

I saw a new client last night. He's pretty well-known on this board that I advertise on so I headed over to his place around 7:30. I was actually excited about it even though it was work-related. I just felt a lot safer so I could get into it more.

I knocked on the door of #6 and this nerdy guy opened the door. He was wearing a plaid button-down shirt and polyester khaki's. Seriously, they made this woosh-woosh sound when he walked. Picture that episode of seinfeld when George buys the suit on sale only to find out it's loud when he walks. THIS GUY DRESSES LIKE GEORGE COSTANZA. But he's taller and skinnier. The hair situation is about the same but #6 didn't wear glasses. I knew he seemed familiar.

We watched the Bourne Ultimatum and ate chinese food. Pretty much the best work date ever. After about 30 minutes he started getting handsy so I just went with it. He went down on me and it was amazing. When we were done, I had practically soaked the couch we were doing it on.

It was a surprisingly good date.

Ashley Dupre, gtfo my tv.

I'm watching CNN in my living room and up next on Reliable Sources is a segment on Ashley Dupre. I have really mixed feelings about her. She's trying to milk it and the sad thing is she probably thinks it'll work. Just because she's prettier than Heidi Fleiss it doesn't mean people are going to see her as anything other than a high-class call girl. So she brought down the Governor of New York. Who cares? Wouldn't be the first time a politician was caught with his dick in his hand.

I get annoyed though because the media calls it a sleazy sex story or they say that Ashley is so sad. The only sad thing is that she didn't even know it was the Governor. The girl is DUMB so I guess she does fall into the stereotype in that respect. Oh, Ashley.

The both of them got off (oh I punned) without charges. Why can't they just take that and go away quietly? I would've taken the money I made and moved to Europe.

Saturday, November 22, 2008

The Dad

So I saw a new client this week. He was really nice, polite, married and showed me pictures of his kids. I've never had someone do that. I thought it was sweet.

I asked him what his story was and he said that his wife was a bipolar alcoholic and that he's only in it for the kids. That's a little sad but I can't blame him too much.

He was pretty much the perfect date, thankfully. I had a shitty experience over the weekend with a guy who was covered in sores so I feel like the universe sort of threw me this one.

Once again, with feeling

It's a little annoying for me to have start this over, but here I am. I had another blog that I was starting to get great feedback from. Unfortunately for me I had a moment of UBER paranoia and had to take it down.

That's the trouble with living a double-life. You're always about to get caught so knowing how to cover your tracks is key. I was doing a little bit of browsing online and decided to look at the old blog of a friend of mine. Unfortunately it wasn't until I clicked the link that I realized I was still on my blog and knowing her she'd have a tracker on her site that would show her the site I came from/my ip address. All she'd have to do is read the blog to start accusing me of things even though there wasn't anything on there that blatantly screamed my name. Still, better safe than sorry.

So here I am, ready to whore another day.